11th Sept.

5 years ago, i was just settling into the historical city of Tübingen... in fact, i remember spending the first months sleeping on my camping air-mat laid over a few duvets in what would become my room for the next 2 yrs of my stint in germany... i had an eucalyptus tree and a garden bench for company... and the slanted roof for cosiness... and living out of my big yellow north-face duffle-bag. classes have already begun at the graduate school... and i got home that afternoon, quite despondent over all the many facts i wish i knew and the work i had to do and the frustration of being in a foreign country and not really able to utter more than "Nah? Wie war dein Tag?!" to my land-lady-flatmate... or to anyone else i knew.

i popped into the living room to find ute sitting in front of her beloved telly... and said hello... she sat me down to watch the horrifying news in german... news of the madness that blew over new york just hours before i got home... i was kinda confused and not quite sure what's being blabbered on the news and it took me like 10 minutes to figure out that my brother could be in danger (or ?!)... and so i tried to call him in NY but i couldn't get though... & panicked... then i decided that maybe my family at home would know of something... so i called them... and boy was i relieved to hear he's fine... but trapped in his office building... until further notice.

i never really figured out what actually happened... because it's not always easy to ask people about it. but i got to speak to my brother a week later and he told me that it was surreal; seeing the 2nd plane crash into the 2nd tower... people throwing themselves out, ... everything collapsing.

so much has happened since... and yet somehow... ground-zero remains a stark reminder of the many gaping holes in hearts that remain too much to bear... not just in america, but in iraq, in sudan (because of the war in iraq; many UN military were unavailable to be sent to help stop the humanitarian crisis there), in spain, in london, in israel, in lebanon, in so many other places...

with all the build-up to the memorial day... i got to watch a documentary film about New York last week while randomly switching channels... and learnt about the controversies about the twin-towers and the architectural designing and building of the world's tallest buildings... some ironies as to their economic purpose and the revival of the lower Manhattan, some amazing engineering triumphs, the spell-binding high-wire walker performance by the french, Philippe Petit, and the gradual attraction of the towers to tourists, business, and their eventual destruction and the carnage...

the recount of the event 5 yrs ago in pictures spoke more than what words could appropriately describe... it is very sad in a multi-faceted way... but i think some positive things have emerged too, albeit being overshadowed by the apparent senseless war(s)...

somewhere amidst the ugly madness... is the amazing human capacity to will ourselves to cope with adversity... the celebration of the simple yet profound things in life; like being able to call my brother in NY even though he doesn't always return my calls... and perhaps a reminder that how we journey through our transient (and interconnected) existence is what we make out of it... carpe diem.

posted by ~overacuppa~ on Monday, 11 September, 2006 at 00:23 hrs